I want you to know that you are not alone in your being alone. -Stephen Fry

Saturday Circle Reflections, December 26, 2020


It was a very visual treatment this week with three clear images coming up at the third eye, the heart and the sacral chakras.

At the third eye, I found myself in the middle of a blizzard. I couldn't see more than an inch in front of me. I didn't feel like I was in danger, but the weather conditions were terrible, and I was outside, really in it, and alone. My instinct told me that the best thing to do was be still, and the storm would eventually pass.

And then, I thought I saw something in the distance, suddenly I could sense that all around me, there were people, tons of them, just like me, bundled up and outside in the storm, alone. And it was enough to know that none of us were alone.

It felt like a revelation. That every time I convince myself that I am alone, I am blind and disadvantage myself. It sunk in like a fundamental truth that, when accepted unconditionally, keeps me awake and aware, I am not alone.

At my heart, I felt my body let go in a way that it hasn't for a long time. When I let go, I felt the exhaustion I avoid, and still, I felt so comforted and held by the earth beneath me.

The image that came was of falling onto a wooden raft. I was wet and exhausted, but when I let myself fall, I found safety and comfort as the raft swayed back and forth. I didn't feel like I was being "saved", but I knew that the raft would carry me until I could hold myself again.

The last image was at my sacral chakra. It was an image of a giant stag, standing over me. I felt my back protected by its two front legs and sat in the shadow of its massive head and horns over me. Only I was a baby.

I knew that the buck represented the Horned God, who dies in the autumn, only to be reborn again at Yule (the baby). I felt how it is within our power to be both the protector (the stag) and the newborn babe.

Something in this image tied the other two tableaus together for me; it reminded me of the importance of honouring cycles. That although our experience of time focuses on the linearity of the events we participate in, time is cyclical too.

The way our heart beats, the way we fall asleep and wake up over and over again, seasons and eras, all necessary cycles.These images reinforced for me that we are in an annual cycle of hibernation and renewal. And that the best thing we can do now is surrender to it.

This week, I encourage you to find ways to let go, and rest. Be protective of the parts of you that are regenerating and being reborn. Take note of what new things are perculating in your mind and your soul, nurture these. And resist the urge to be "doing".

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